Maddie Ann … Nicu Nurse to Nicu Mom
Ever since I was young, my dream was to be a NICU nurse. In 2019, my dream finally came true. I found myself working in a level 3 NICU with some very critical babies. The following year I got pregnant with my son. When deciding on where to deliver, I chose Sentara Princess Anne because they had a NICU. My son was born in August of 2020. And everything was textbook and we went home 2 days after he was born. I then became pregnant again and was due in March of 2022. Once again, my plan was to deliver at SPAH.
Around midnight on February 18, 2022 my husband and I went into the hospital for decreased fetal movement. We checked into the hospital at 1:15am and in less than an hour I had an emergency c-section for fetal distress. Madelyn Ann was born at 2:16 am. My OB said when she cut me open, my placenta was detaching from my uterus. Madelyn was born with a hematocrit of 11 (should be closer to 50) and had to receive emergency blood. They also had a concern for PPHN (persistent pulmonary hypertension of the newborn) so she was started on the Jet Vent. Madelyn had things wrong that the NICU at SPAH could not handle. She was transferred to CHKD.
Here I was, a NICU nurse now living the NICU mom life. I felt helpless. My knowledge was a blessing and a curse. I knew how critical my baby was. And I had to just step back and watch. The hardest part was leaving my baby behind. I can now empathize with the moms of the babies I care for. Leaving your baby behind is one of the worst feelings I have ever felt. One of the most beneficial things about being a NICU nurse turned NICU mom is the close relationships I have with the neonatologists. I was very blessed to feel comfort knowing who was in charge of my baby’s care. They also let me know how serious this situation was. I’ll never forget when Dr. Dillender told me (way after the fact) that when Madelyn was born, she wasn’t sure she was going to make it. This really put things in to perspective for me.
My experience as a NICU nurse only prepared me for some of what was wrong with my baby. Madelyn was born with Hemolytic Disease of the Fetus/Newborn (HDFN), (PPHN), cholestasis, thrombocytopenia, VSD, PFO and PDA. All of this I had very little experience with.
Madelyn’s stay at CHKD was filled with many procedures and events. She had 7 platelet transfusions, 2 cryoprecipitate infusions, she had a UAL, UVL and a PICC line. She was on and off phototherapy, being on 7 lights at one point. She was points away from getting a full exchange transfusion. She had an MRI, and multiple echos. She was on the Jet Vent with nitric oxide for 5days, and then moved to High Flow oxygen for a few days. And she also had a feeding tube because of her oxygen requirements. She was on more meds than I can count, including being given lasix (a diuretic) at one point. This caused her to lose 500 grams overnight, causing our stay to be extended because she wasn’t gaining weight. This rollercoaster toyed with my emotions. Our discharge date got pushed and my heart was crushed. But by the grace of God, she only spent 15 days in the NICU.
Madelyn was followed by cardiology, GI, the NICU follow up clinic and hematology. She was readmitted a week after discharge for a 2nd blood transfusion. She had a 3rd transfusion a month later. She is now 7 months old and has been cleared by ALL of the specialists. She is growing and thriving and doing better than we could have ever anticipated! She truly is our miracle baby.
Becoming a NICU mom was a very eye opening experience. I now feel a deeper connection with the moms I work with. I can relate in a way I never expected. I also found myself being “that NICU mom”. The one who stayed the night. The one who called multiple times a day. And the one who even fired a nurse because I felt she didn’t have Maddie’s best interest at heart. I now find myself sitting and talking with moms more, and doing everything I can to advocate for baby AND mom. During our time at CHKD, I learned a lot about HDFN and have since become an advocate for babies born with it, helping educate my coworkers.
We are SO grateful for the staff at CHKD. They took such good care of our baby girl. Our nurses (*Miranda*, Michelle, Brooke, Jordan, Hannah, Ciara, Jamie, Dana, Sidney, Joanne, Ruby, Logan, Stephanie, Anna, Jess, Kat, Morgan, Maya, Jess, Tiffany, Dara, and Alison) were so understanding and helpful during such a difficult experience. AND Dr. Tiffany, Dr. Dillender, Dr. Armentrout and Barb, NP were so patient and kind. Everyone included myself and my husband in every decision that was made. I truly believe if it wasn’t for the staff at CHKD, as well as the grace of God, Madelyn wouldn’t be here today.
